Are We Hiding Misery With a Smile?

Is it commercialism that has influenced us to slide slowly away from the real? Sure we pretend to be engaged in our world; we even go so far as to construct houses and build personal facades that would make Myron jealous, but why? Why are we so intent on hiding so well? We spend most of our waking moments building and fortifying these barriers to the world. The empathic wall, sweeteners, salt, dressing, watches, jewelry, make-up, botox, pilates, protein shakes, over-priced cars, manicures, facials, “spa treatments”, pop-psychology, the Wall Street Journal, hair dye, contact lenses, jeans that fit just right, the perfectly decorated entry/condo/urban apartment…they all hide us from something. Are we hiding from others or are we really hiding from ourselves?

Do you know what your coffee, tea, breakfast or lunch really tastes like anymore? Why must we cover every taste, smell and real thing with something else? Our ancestors ate off the bush, out of the ground and kneeling over the fire. Our ancestors weren’t slaves to the norms of the group, they were an engaged in and an integral part of its creation and function. If the Alpha Male wanted a mate he chose and it was simple. He didn’t haveto buff a shiny spear and fake his status; he was athletic and adept and charismatic and that was enough. The code, the norms, were constructed out of honest action, not feigned bravado. Status was earned through intelligent action not universal deception. How has the pendulum swung so damn far the other way?

Business cards, websites and billboards inform us who is important in our milieu. What of those who toil without hiding from themselves? The healthy heart and modest mind are living in quiet desperation, increasingly alone in their daily test to live what is right and what is real. To reward and recognize these righteous soldiers would be to drag them down into the faux-wasteland with the rest of us. Those of us living the lie have pulled the wool down over our own eyes. We buy it for ourselves and we buy into it because we don’t want to know the truth. We construct a fantasy in our heads, ignoring the genuine nature of our world so that every day, little by little, we move further and further from the truth. On this fools journey we increase our delusion whilst decreasing our happiness. A genuine life is our only hope for existential salvation – but how can we turn back now? How can we save ourselves from a script that we have spent so many years and dollars and emotional energy creating and protecting?

Psychologists these days are pushing the idea that conscious will is an illusion. If we accept this idea then we are slaves to a horrible prison of torturous existence, a dungeon of our own creation. The secret to our escape is to realize that we are the jailer and we are not pinned down by the unrelenting natural disaster of consumer culture. The key is to know it and to recognize its bond. We must look inside and see that our real self is still alive, whole and untouched by the true evil that surrounds us – only then do we gain access to the value within.

Can  I ever let go of the desire to have a status that demands respect?

Can you stop telling me what a good job you have and just do it?

Can I stop working out to get praise and enjoy it?

Can you stop buying what others will approve of and be comfortable?

The Ad-Man and politician create ideas that we buy without knowing why. Open your eyes and instead of trying to conform, ask the question: What is real? What can I do/buy/think that will help me dig out of this mindless, self-dug hole? Nothing. We are buried by commercial crap. We put it on our food, we spray it on our skin, we look through it when we stare blindly at the sun.

We must find a way to live genuinely. We must choose to taste life without disguise, additive or processed flavor. We must look  ourselves and others in the eyes and say what is in our heart. We must spend time every day looking inside, ready with a shovel and the willingness to dig until it hurts. We can only remove one scrap of emotional garbage at a time, because if we try the quick-fix, like a Dr Phil magic trick, we will simply end up with a rabbit, wand and a hat on top of the pile we are already under.

We must face our truths one honest moment at a time. We must start first with ourselves and then with our possessions and our emotional “jewelry.”  We must embrace and connect with our loved ones. Life is too precious and short to harbor negativity towards those with which we share blood. If we can complete these arduous and impossible tasks then we must address the faux-wool world of rampant consumerism and greed. Under this focused freedom of will, the bonds of modern social slavery become a dandelion in the breath of a playful child. Freedom can be ours but a tedious and hard-fought battle is ahead. Happiness is out there for us to reclaim if we are willing to be vulnerable and challenge the norm. We are at the nadir of our fight against a war machine stronger than ever before. If we don’t act now, today, in this very moment, then we risk living out a lie where all that is left is the fake, Botox face of someone pretending to be real; of Pinocchio hiding misery with a smile.